Fortunate

Sometimes, I feel very fortunate. I just get lucky- like the fact that my traffic ticket was dismissed. I mean, at this point in my life, it would really hurt my pockets to pay that fine. It's never a good time to pay off fines and tickets, but now more then ever, I need those funds to pay for things that I genuinely need to move forward life wise or career wise.

I feel a little stuck sometimes. I go to sleep when I feel really overwhelmed, which is a bad habit, but I would rather do that than turn to more harmful addictions. I relax for a second just to feel my heart beat. All the depression and anxiety in the past year seems to have had a negative effect on my poor esophagus. I feel the area below my ribcage and untie the knots from my sore esophagus by massaging it with my fingers. Then, I close my eyes and attempt to meditate and ground myself. I think about how lucky I am and how I am named after "Shree", the Hindu goddess of fortune, beauty and prosperity. I am fine, I am well, and once I am awake, I will power on. It's my promise to myself.